When you purchase a used book, you always run the risk of finding bent corners, highlights, margin marks, doodles and random bookmarks.
I found this bookmark in my copy of the Illustrated Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. I always like that people grab what’s closest to them for a bookmark. Thank goodness I’ve never found a piece of toilet paper. 😂
I looked it up and this place still exists at this location. I wonder if the previous owner ever got their appointment scheduled.
This was the first week of the Intensive Outpatient Program. The group started with 7, then 5, then 4, and then 3. I don’t think it’s my presence causing the dwindling – I have been showering regularly. In seriousness, it’s a completely different therapist, only three hours of therapy, and an entirely different vibe altogether. I really liked my first therapist for being so “real” for lack of a better word. My second therapist I like for their passion and compassion to the program.
I’m glad I decided to go to IOP as a step-down program. I wish I wasn’t so tired after group and could work more than just two hours, but it’s a gradual process and I’m learning to live with it.
Since, my manager has been having their own health struggles, another coworker of ours has really had to step up, and take on additional responsibility. In appreciation, my manager and I sent her a couple of gifts to show our appreciation. One was just a bracelet, but the other was a dammit doll. They come with a cute poem that I don’t remember at the moment, but the main purpose of a dammit doll is to beat the hell out of it when you’re frustrated or have other negative emotions. This allows you to shift your focus outward instead of inward, and protects you from hurting others once you’ve directed that emotional energy outward. I made one during one lengthy stay in a different hospital many years ago. I highly recommend them.
I’m hoping that my full time back to work date is in the next couple of weeks. I genuinely think I needed these programs and I’m not sure what state I would be I had I not gone. But I’m anxious to return to a semi-normal work/life routine.
Not going to lie, I’ve always wanted a label maker. So, I bought a thermal label maker off Amazon during the Memorial Day sale. I was at a loss at first as to how I was going to use my new toy. Then, I realized I was going to take my nerdiness to the next level and label and organize all the papers I’ve been getting from the group programs I’ve been in. No regrets.
I was only out sick for 3 weeks. But in that time, I missed everyone deeply and they missed me too. The proof is in the pudding, so to speak, since I was sent this lovely bouquet of flowers from two of my favorite people and wonderful coworkers. I can’t thank them enough for the lovely thoughts. Bonus was that they remembered my favorite flowers (tulips and carnations) and made sure that the bouquet included those. They were beautiful and absolutely made my day!
My therapist in the partial hospitalization program was a Harry Potter fan. It was something we could both agree on, among many other things. I wanted to paint on Thursday night, but I just wasn’t sure what I wanted to make… I did a quick Pinterest search and came up with an idea. It’s not my best work, it’s not cleverly original, but we both liked it and that was all that mattered.
While I was sick from the beginning of the year, I lost all in interest in my hobbies. I rarely embroidered, I quit painting and didn’t take any time for myself. If I napped it, was a minor miracle. I mostly just forced myself to work hour after hour. After beginning in the partial hospitalization program, my interest improved. Yes, I spent less of my day at “work” which gave me more time in the day, but I also felt like doing something, finally. The coping skills I was learning in group, were slowly improving my mental outlook. Before I knew it, I was coloring, or writing, or reading. I even finished an embroidery that I started in December. Most of my embroideries take a month, two tops. This one took six months. It was originally based on a paint tutorial, but I definitely went my own way with it.
TW: Mental Health
I’ve “graduated” from the partial hospitalization program. I wasn’t sure what to expect, especially coming in from off the street instead of inpatient. When you are in inpatient, you make friends and when you move on to PHP those friends go with you. When you are coming straight into PHP you don’t have that connection. The last time I did PHP like this, I never connected or felt close to anyone. Maybe that’s due to a difference in health level, or a difference in age and maturity. Regardless, this time I made several connections that I think I will keep going moving forward. We’ve exchanged hugs, and phone numbers and we’re even starting a DnD group.
I also feel like a I got a lot more out of PHP this time. Again, maybe it was age, maturity or health, but maybe it was because of those connections that I made. Also, the therapist this time is by far the best group therapist I’ve ever had and unfortunately, I’ve had many. I even painted a gift for my therapist on my last day.
In honor of graduating, I got a certificate, a pen from my therapist and hyped up by (almost) everyone in the room. I was told I was welcoming and had a wonderful smile. I was told that I put people at ease on their first day (3 separate times). One person told me some very nice things that I can’t remember all of since he also told me that I was like a mother figure. I was flattered and horrified in one breath. I will miss them all and am happy that I will still see them in the lobby during IOP. And hopefully some of them will graduate and join us in IOP.
I’m going to reiterate the importance of asking for help. Mental health matters and you should be kind to your mind and all that other jazz. Get a therapist, a psychiatrist, go inpatient or partial hospitalization, go to support groups. What is important is that you ASK FOR HELP.
Look, I know I have no balance. I stumble constantly. I can trip on a flat surface. I fell down the stairs in December (or was it January). I know that I am a fall risk. But dammit iPhone, I feel called out. >_>
At the hospital I’ve been going to, there is a bird’s nest that was built on a megaphone post thingy. The first day I never saw anything but the nest. The next day, I saw that it was a robin’s nest. I love robins. And on the third day, I got the best surprise.
On my first day of partial hospitalization, I was so nervous. But it was a half day and the therapist that day was fantastic. I don’t remember everything we did that day, but what I remember the most was that we wrote letters to our mental health. I actually wrote two and found it very cathartic. I met some great people that first day. I found a couple of geeky friends as well as a couple of inspirational friends. I laughed half the day and found that this group and group therapy was going to be good for my soul.
It was a beautiful April day and we decided to sit outside… for five hours. It felt so good, but needless to say that much sun and no sunscreen, disaster. Before:
After:
My Plucky Life 